Residential Customer? Bell hates you.

A quick follow-up on the downward spiral that is the “communications infrastructure” within my household that I started here the other day.

This morning I went around and plugged back in some of the phones that I had pulled out earlier in the week while troubleshooting my unreliable Internet connection.

No dial tone.

“Odd” I think, and then run around and check the other phones – same deal on all of them. On a lark I grab my Vonage line – surprisingly it’s working. So I’ve got no dial tone and (a speed test reveals) a reasonably fast connection.

Just for kicks I dial my Bell # from the Vonage line – someone not of my house answers. “I’m sorry, I think I have the wrong number, is this ###-###-####?”.

“Actually you have the right number, but the wrong house – is this supposed to be your number?”

Don’t ask my how or why but in the process of checking the quality of my phone number the other night Bell crossed my phone line over with someone else – although neither of us are sure where her phone # has wandered off to as I didn’t get it.

Bell Repair Call #1
She tells me she’s reported the issue already but I decide to call Bell anyways as most of our family uses the Bell line to get in touch with us. I muddle through the ever-helpful “Emily”, their chipper voice recognition system that just drags the painful process out even more (I really hate Emily) and finally end up predictably on hold.

Listening to Yanni…

In an endless loop…

At such a loud volume it’s actually distorting the line…

FOR 65 MINUTES (The Yanni loop BTW is about 20 minutes long)

No one picks up and I have things to do.

Bell Repair Call #2
Curse at Emily some more (adding obscenities to every option doesn’t help give her a sense of urgency). Hold for 15 minutes.

Give up and decide another tactic.

Bell Repair Call #3 (Moments later)
Instead of falling for Emily’s clever trick I tell her it’s a problem with my business line.

Three bars of Yanni and then I get a support rep – And he gets an earful.

In Bell’s universe Business and Residential are on completely different systems so of course he’s no use and transfers me over to the Residential guys again. Foiled!

While I was on hold again I start searching online, other local home service providers, Digital phone etc. and lo and behold 35 Minutes later (A combined total of 110 Minutes listening to Yanni today – someone ex-CIA is clearly in charge of Customer Service there) I hang up and dial Cogeco.

In the end it took Cogeco less than ten minutes to sort out my phone and Internet problems – they’re coming on Friday to set everything up and in one bundled swoop (for $10 less than I’m paying and a connection twice as fast) Bell, Look & Vonage are gone.

I wish I’d done this right off the bat this morning.

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